# Enough arguing: 6 tips for solution‑focused conflict management

- URL: https://hr-passionista.com/en/conflict-management-6-tips-for-better-resolution/
- Published: 2026-01-26
- Updated: 2026-01-29
- Author: Marion Eppinger (HR-Passionista)
- Categories: communication, management communication

> 6 tips for effective conflict management: How leaders can resolve issues confidently and improve team communication.

##### **Controversies can arise w****herever people work together and emotions are involved. Thank goodness for that, because otherwise we would all be robots! However, knowing how to behave correctly in such situations is often not so easy.**

As we spend most of our time at work, misunderstandings and conflicts have a greater impact on our **well-being** and cloud our **everyday working lives**. Unfortunately, this often leads to mountains being made out of a molehills.

Problems with cooperation and communication with colleagues not only **cost time, energy and** **money**, as **productivity in teams** is severely **impaired**.

From **a personal point of view,** conflicts naturally affect our **mood,** creating **stress**, that we may take home with us. And who wants that?

### Ultimately, we all want to live stress-free and without conflict, don’t we?

**Recognising conflicts early and acting constructively** is the real art of solution-oriented conflict management. Here are my **6** easy-to-implement **tips** on how to resolve conflicts successfully:

##### **1\. Breathe and reflect**

When you’re angry, pause for a moment, take a deep breath and consider how you will react to the conflict situation. This is a good first step. Distancing yourself helps you to approach the issue more clearly and avoid overreacting emotionally!

##### **2\. Create a private and safe environment**

Conversations in a safe environment give everyone involved the opportunity to express their emotions and views freely. Another advantage is that it prevents uninvited parties from interfering.

##### **3\. Listen to both sides!**

Different perceptions often reflect individuals‘ experiences of the same event. Therefore, all points of view should be heard. The following questions can help facilitate this conversation:

-   What exactly is the problem that is being argued about?
-   What do you want to clarify?
-   What can each person contribute to finding a solution?

##### **4\. What is it really about?**

Where there is a conflict, it is important to find out **what it is really about.** You are looking for the **„core“** of the disagreement, so to speak.

Often, we argue with someone because they remind us of something and we associate them with it. Sometimes, people are on the receiving end of aggression that has nothing to do with them, for example bringing arguments from home to work, stress, frustration, etc. or because someone has hit a sore spot (e.g. questioning my competence or skipping hierarchies and leaving me out).

It is important to keep asking questions until you discover **the root of the problem**. Sometimes it helps to simply guess. If we trust our **intuition**, it will guide us and lead us to **the source of the conflict**. This may sound a bit esoteric, but how often has our **instinct** been right when making decisions?

##### **5\. Summarise what you have found out about the conflict**

Write a neutral summary and communicate it to those involved to obtain their approval.

##### **6\. The final discussion**

It is a good idea to conclude the conflict resolution process with a private discussion. Important components are:

-   repeating the decision that has been made
-   thanking everyone involved for their commitment and communication in resolving the problem
-   working out a solution and agreeing on a joint approach, to which both parties must adhere to in future
-   offering to be available for any future questions, thoughts or discussions

All of these points can be unpleasant and often **highly emotional**. It is important to keep a cool head during such conversations, **to remain constructive** treating each other **with courtesy and respect**, regardless of the topic.

It is important to use **„I“ messages**, **to proceed sensitively** and **to avoid taking sides** – every point of view can be important in resolving a conflict successfully.

If you feel overwhelmed by the situation and unable to resolve the conflict, a **mediator** can be a useful **last resort**. But it doesn’t have to come to that. Most conflicts can be resolved with the „right“ approach without the need for outside help. 

### **Prevention is better than cure**

An important way to aspect to avoid conflict is to communicate with each other in advance in a way that is based on values and is non-violent and to create a safe environment where disagreements can be addressed openly.

After all, statements such as: …

> 1.  *„I would be willing to compromise if you weren’t so stubborn about this point!“*
>
> 2.  *„I think it’s childish that you always speak so badly about me behind my back!“*
>
> 3.  *„He always treats me so condescendingly, as if I were new*  *to the profession and I knew nothing about the subject matter!“*
>

… are **judgemental** and can **lead** to **misunderstandings**.

### **The right wording is important**

**Neutral and positive wording** establishes a foundation of trust and productive **cooperation**. Here is a suggestion on how the above statements can be rephrased so that they **can be accepted** as **value-free**:

1.  > *„If she is willing to talk, I am ready to compromise.“*

2.  > *„I have noticed on several occasions that you have criticised me in front of others in my absence. That is not very respectful, and I would prefer you to address your criticism directly to me.“*

3.  > *„I would like to be recognised for my work and receive appropriate acknowledgement for it.“*


![](https://hr-passionista.com/media/2025/11/DSC01841-Edit.jpg)

### My conclusion

These were simple tips on how to deal with conflicts more successfully. However, it is best to adhere to the words of Jerome Anders (\*1975, artist and philosopher):

### *„The best way to resolve conflicts is to prevent them from arising in the first place.“*